Letter from an Agnostic

Letter from an Agnostic
By James Archer

Dealing with some sadness tonight regarding people and how they choose to treat me and mine in specific, but others in general. Would like to share a thought about beliefs, religion and dealing with people. If you'd rather not know my feelings about these things, please skip this post.

I grew up in a religious household, and have chosen to disassociate myself from religion as an adult. I am an agnostic, probably- I rarely feel the need to classify myself. From the Greek Gnosis, a basic noun referring to knowledge; the a- prefix makes it a negative: so lack of knowledge is the intended meaning- I admit that I don't know. I don't admit to or confess anything else, just to be perfectly clear.

The problem I find is that some people take it upon themselves to act inappropriately towards me and those I love because they have a religious feeling that is different from my own. And again, to be clear- I am very tolerant of others' religious beliefs- I have no desire to insult anyone's honest findings for themselves, and indeed can admire folks who have found themselves an answer honestly that they can truly believe. This post is not about religion- this post is about people.

When someone says to me and mine any of the following: You are going to hell; You are damned; You must do what I do; You must think what I think; (this one was new to me tonight) When I get to heaven, I won't even have known that you existed, because all of my sorrows will be removed and you will be in hell; or any other such statement...

...the only thing I feel is hurt. I do not feel inspired to believe anything. I do not feel motivated to avoid eternal damnation; I do not feel that the speaker has provided me a service, or shared their beautiful faith- I feel hurt that someone would take it upon themselves to insult my intelligence; to insult my sensibilities; to attempt to instill in me an eternal fear regarding my children; to bear their teeth necessarily and act in a way that insists upon a better than thou attitude; more blessed than thou; more deserving than thou; more insightful than thou; and - oddly - more lucky than thou.
If a person actually cared about me and mine, they would insist on loving us past the point that we could deny their altruism; past the point that we could doubt that they had some type of insight into this painful, stupid, silly and difficult human condition- to the point that we asked them to be let in on their secret-- that we asked to be instructed, if such a time ever came; and if that time never came, they would treat us that way anyway--- because their point would be loving us, and treating in a way they thought was right; not proving to us that we are wrong and they are right, which is the only point when someone informs us that we are damned.

Let me say that again, so it sinks in: If you are trying to win an argument of who has got it all figured out, you are actively turning me and mine away from everything you are saying.

The Jesus that I learned of as a child ate with the sinners; all you know how to do is throw stones.
And so-- if it is your prerogative to ever- ever, ever, ever- I mean one single time, ever-- tell me and my loved ones that we are headed to hell and should change to become more like you, do us both the favor and never-- and I mean never-- speak to any of us again. I have shielded my own feeling and thoughts many times in my life, in order to keep from upsetting people in this very important and very sensitive area, but I am officially done with that now. Now, when you behave offensively, I will speak my mind.

A last thought-

When I think of my father, I think of a great example of someone with strong religious beliefs who behaves correctly to the people he encounters-- my father would love to tell you his thoughts, but he is willing to love you even if you disagree with him, and he will feed you without feeling like you owe it to him to convert. A brilliant example of a person who professes love, and then attempts to live it. If all religious people did more of that, and less of the other, I imagine there'd be a few more folks at your church--- and more importantly than that, you’d be treating people in a respectable manner-- a manner that they deserve from you, no matter your opinion of their religious associations or lack thereof.

(a quick note to my atheist and agnostic or other friends-- please do not use this post as an open forum to bash the religious-- I have no desire to be involved in that; this is a thought about people, not about God)

An Apology from a Christian

by Tanya Dwyer

I am sorry for the ways that Christians have behaved like idiots in your life.

I am sorry for the times they said one thing and did another.

I am sorry for the way you opened up your heart to them, believing they were representatives of a good God, and then they didn’t even really “see” you, and they trampled over you with their agenda to earn badges for God.

I regret, I deeply regret, the hypocrisy that was portrayed and how it has left you with a sour flavor wondering if that is who God really is.

The ways that religion and its manmade rules were purported as a higher way was wrong. The things you were told you had to quit or change were told to you by people who did not understand the model of transforming love. They took a role God did not intend for them to take.

Their assignment was to love you. In not doing that well, you got hurt. I wish that had not happened. I wish you had not been hurt.

I am sorry that you were seen as a project that someone else could use to gain approval with God.

I am sorry for the dishonor-for the ways your culture and heritage were not respected.

I apologize for the disregard of your personal story and history, and the way you were devalued as an individual.

I am sorry for the judgments; for the times when you were made to feel like a lesser than, or left feeling ignorant because the Christians all seemed to have a certain language they assumed you should know.

I am sorry for the times you felt excluded. That is the very opposite of love.

I am sorry for the times that ‘punishment’ included not letting you belong if you didn’t ‘behave’ according to their rules. How painful that is!

I just wanted to let you know today, I don’t know your story, but I would like to. When we sit down and talk, I don’t have an agenda.

I have done worse things than most people, so it’s easy for me to not judge you.

I don’t believe there is a set of rules that transforms me. I think it’s Love.

I give you permission to call me out if I get religious.

I think if we learn each other’s language we may be friends. I am hopeful that we can learn things from each other. I am sure we will find things to laugh about. I would like to try.

I am a Christian. To me, that means I follow the way of Love. I hope you won’t hold it against me.

Punishment or Cure?

The Crucifixion Misunderstood
by Wayne Jacobsen

Something about the story made me cringe every time I heard it, and since I grew up a Baptist, I heard it a lot: To satisfy His need for justice and His demand for holiness, God sentenced His own Son to death in the brutal agony of a crucifixion as punishment for the failures and excesses of humanity.

Don’t get me wrong. I want as much mercy as I can get. If someone else wants to take a punishment I deserve and I get off scot free, I’m fine with that. But what does this narrative force us to conclude about the nature of God?

As we approach Easter, the crucifixion story most often told paints God as an angry, blood-thirsty deity whose appetite for vengeance can only be satisfied by the death of an innocent—the most compassionate and gracious human that ever lived. Am I the only one who struggles with that? The case could be made that it makes God not much different from Molech, Baal or any of the other false deities that required human sacrifice to sate their uncontrollable rage.

We wouldn’t think this story an act of love from anyone else. If you offend me, and the only way I can forgive you is to satisfy my need for justice by directing the full force of my anger for you onto my own son by beating him to death, you probably wouldn’t think me worth knowing. You certainly wouldn’t think of me as loving. And this solution ostensibly comes from the God who asks us as mere humans to forgive others without seeking vengeance. Is He demanding that we be more gracious than He is?

Many of the Old Testament writers did look forward to the cross as a sacrifice that would satisfy God, and they used the language of punishment to explain it. But the New Testament writers looking back through the redemption of the cross saw it very differently. They didn’t see it as the act of an angry God seeking restitution, but the self-giving of a loving God to rescue broken humanity.

Their picture of the cross does not present God as a brutalizing tyrant expending His anger on an innocent victim, but as a loving Father who took the devastation of our failures and held it in the consuming power of His love until sin was destroyed and a portal opened for us to re-engage a trusting relationship with the God of the universe. The New Testament writers saw the cross not as a sacrifice God needed in order to love us, but one we needed to be reconciled to Him.

One of my best friends died of melanoma almost two years ago. Doctors tried to destroy the cancer with the most aggressive chemotherapy they could pour into his body. In the end, it wasn’t enough. The dose needed to kill his melanoma would have killed him first. That was God’s dilemma in wanting to rescue us. The passion He had to cure our sin would overwhelm us before the work was done. Only God Himself could endure the regimen of healing our brokenness demanded.

So He took our place. He embraced our disease by becoming sin itself, and then drank the antidote that would consume sin in His own body. This is substitutionary atonement. He took our place because He was the only one that could endure the cure for our sin. God’s purpose in the cross was not to defend His holiness by punishing Jesus instead of us, but to destroy sin in the only vessel that could hold it until—in God’s passion—sin was destroyed.

Perhaps we need to rethink the crucifixion in line with those early believers. God was not there brutalizing His Son as retribution for our failures; He was loving us through the Son in a way that would set us free to know Him and transform us to be like Him.

Now that’s a God worth knowing.

Jacobsen links: Life Stream, The God Journey, Transition & The Jesus Lens

I Love Them Whores

Great post from Erik Guzman, The Merry Monk over at Burnside Writers Collective. This will provoke you in the best possible way.

ESSAYS, FEATURED — BY THE MERRY MONK ON SEPTEMBER 7, 2011 AT 5:27 AM 

“I love them whores, they never judge you. What can you say when you’re a whore?”

- Jane’s Addiction

I’ve been thinking about whores, church and Jesus lately (not necessarily in that order).

There’s a story in the Bible about a prostitute who just had to get some time with Jesus (Luke 7:36-50). She wanted to get close to him so bad that she went to a dinner put on by a religious bigwig.

Think about that scene. Hooker hygiene must have been atrocious back in the year zero. So you have this stinky whore who crashes the party of a priest who is probably trying to impress all his churchy friends by having the people’s prophet over for a meal at his house. Imagine the stares and the whispered comments. Imagine the condescending tone of the servant sent to show her the door. Imagine this woman’s determination to put up with all these religious pricks so she can weep and pour expensive oil on some preaching carpenter’s feet and wipe them with her hair. Imagine the smell of hooker stank mixed with the fragrant mixture from her alabaster flask.

What was it about Jesus that attracted her? Maybe she saw him treat the drunks, outcasts and the diseased with dignity and she wanted some for herself. Maybe it was because he told her she was clean in spite of all evidence to the contrary and it gave her hope. Who knows for sure. But one thing is clear, this woman wanted to be with Jesus bad and the priest was a hindrance, not a help.

I feel like that a lot of the time… a whore in church.

Why is it that the people who claim to follow Jesus have created churches that hookers don’t feel comfortable in? They were certainly comfortable around him. I tell you what, you show me a church that can’t keep the whores away and I bet you Jesus is in there. If you find a place like that, let me know. I’d rather be in a room full of forgiven sinners who love God than at an uptight priest’s house any day.

Don’t get me wrong, not all churches are repulsive to us whores. Christians get a clue from time to time. I recently came across a quote from Eugene Peterson (he and God wrote The Message). Peterson was talking to NPR’s Guy Raz about how his experience working in his father’s butcher shop impacted his idea of church. (No, it didn’t have anything to do with slaughtering sheep.) Peterson’s dad treated everyone with respect, including the prostitutes:

“The brothel was just about two streets down from our shop. And there was always talk on the street about the whores. But when they came into our store, people knew their first name, they treated them with dignity.

They were in a safe place. Later, that translated for me into a congregation. When you come into a sanctuary, it’s a safe place.”

A safe place. I used to have a safe place. I experienced it in a small church for eight simple, glorious years. That church is gone now and I’m mourning the loss. While I don’t feel comfortable around a lot of other Christians, I felt at home there. You know what made the difference? We were all whores and we knew it, but more than that, we were Jesus’ whores.

St. Augustine is reported to have said, “The Church is a whore, but she is my mother.” Yeah, Jesus loves whores so much he married one. You know, bad things happen when the Church forgets she’s Jesus’ whore bride.

First, this bad religion has a deceptive way of lulling us into a false sense of security. We believe all the right stuff and do our best to avoid our religious community’s “big sins” so we figure we’re not as bad as all those sinners on the streets. It’s dangerous to live up to our own selective standards while forgetting God’s law of love. I forget who said it, but it’s true, “Self-righteousness is like bad breath. Everyone knows you have it except you.” Whores don’t have this problem. They know they’re nasty.

“Therefore I say to you, her sins, which are many…” (Luke 7:47). If the Church would remember that she’s a whore, she’d get over herself and her “righteousness” and start obsessing on Jesus’ righteousness. But we can’t stop there.

Seeing that we’re bad and he’s good only deals with the first half of the problem. We also need to see that Jesus’ righteousness is 100% free and ours for the taking. The whore and her Husband are now one flesh. “Therefore I say to you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven…” (more of Luke 7:47). Believing that we’re made clean by union with Jesus, despite all evidence to the contrary, strikes at the second half of the problem.

When the Church forgets she’s Jesus’ whore bride, she’s not only lulled into a false sense of security, she also loses her ability to love. “Therefore I say to you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much. But to whom little is forgiven, the same loves little” (even more of Luke 7:47). When we forget that we are forgiven much, our love grows cold. That’s why Steve Brown says, “The worst thing you have going for you is your goodness… when you know it. And the best thing you have going for you is your sin… when you know it.” Knowing our sin, acknowledging it as such and turning to God in faith for his free righteousness creates soft hearts of gratitude where once there was only stone. We love him (and others) because he first loves us. Get that backwards and you get loveless religion.

Lack of love leads to a multitude of sins, including creating whitewashed tombs and calling them churches. They’re pretty on the outside, but they’re full of death. No wonder the prostitutes don’t darken their doors. They can smell the stench miles away, and the last thing they need is more stank.

Sorry for the rant. I’m just really sad about losing my safe place.

Multiple Choice Test

Multiple Choice: Please pick one.
Jesus said "all men will know you are my disciples if __________"
 (a) You have a world class marketing strategy
 (b) Your ministry is branded perfectly
 (c) You've achieved doctrinal purity
 (d) You are theologically sound
 (e) You speak the truth
 (f) You're right
 (g) You are an apostle, prophet, evangelist, pastor or teacher
 (h) You operate in spiritual gifts
 (i) You love one another

In This House...

Desiring the Kingdom

"to be human is to be a lover." ~ James K. A. Smith


James K.A. Smith - Desiring the Kingdom: Worship, Worldview, and Cultural Formation from Calvin College on Vimeo.

Buy it here

Seven Characteristics of Spiritual Abuse

From “The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse” by David Johnson and Jeff VanVonderen

1. Shame-based Relationships: People learn to be or act powerless. Shame is not the same as guilt, a constructive signal which is an emotional indication of wrong actions or attitudes. Shame is a destructive signal about your personal worth, a belief or mindset that you are a bad and worthless person. (pp. 54-55)

2. Performance Focus: With this focus, how people act is more important than who they are or what is happening to them on the inside. (p. 56)

3. Idolatry: The "god" served by the shame-based relationship is an impossible-to-please judge, who obsesses on people's behavior from a distance, and is more concerned about appearance, how things look, what people think and where the power is. (p. 57)

4. Preoccupation with Fault and Blame: Forgiveness and personal apology are not enough when things go wrong, people have to pay for their mistakes and feel so defective and humiliated that they won't act that way anymore. (p. 58)

5. Obscured Reality: In shame-based systems, members have to deny any thought, opinion or feeling that is different than those of people in authority. Interaction with people and places outside the system threatens the order of things; the system (or organization) defines reality. Problems are denied or minimized, and therefore they remain (unless things change, they remain the same). (p. 58)

6. Centralized Teaching: What is true is decided on the feelings or experiences of the religious leadership, giving more weight to them than to what the Bible says. People can't know or understand spiritual truth until the leaders "receive them by spiritual revelation from the Lord" or "until the timing is right" or "until the people are ready", at which time the spiritual leaders "impart" these truths to the people. (p. 70)

7. Image Management: Image managers are more concerned with how they look to other people, and in a shame-based system, religious leaders are loathe admitting error and slow to admit the truth. What counts less is the substance of the spiritual material, and more on how it looks and makes people feel. (pp. 131-136)

What I Want To Do

This is what I want to do in 5 simple steps

1. I want to be a friend of God.
2. I want to comprehensively experience God's extravagant love for me.
3. I want to love people as extravagantly as I have been loved.
4. I want to introduce my extravagantly loving Friend to everyone I know.
5. I want to help others experience this ongoing love affair for themselves.

What do you want to do?

Loving People Different Than You

Dave Gibbons: Engaging in 3rd Culture Mission [VERGE 2010 Main Session] from Verge Network on Vimeo.

How We Short-Circuit the Power of God

J. Lee Grady Newsletters - Fire In My Bones

We can't have New Testament power if we don't walk in New Testament love


The New Testament church was characterized by exciting miracles and supernatural anointing, but it was not immune to division. The earliest churches suffered splits—not only because of doctrine but also because of bitter personal disputes.

Even the apostle Paul, who modeled Christian affection and implored his followers to preserve the bond of love, had an unfortunate disagreement with his close colleague, Barnabas, early in their ministry partnership.

The exact nature of their argument is a mystery. We only know that Paul did not want to take John Mark, Barnabas' cousin, on his second missionary journey because the young disciple had deserted the team in Pamphylia. Acts 15:39 says: "And there occurred such a sharp disagreement that they separated from one another, and Barnabas took Mark with him and sailed to Cyprus. (NASB)"

"Paul always looked for the hidden blessing in every trial. Have you been complaining about your situation? Grumbling short-circuits faith, but joy revives it."

We can only speculate about what happened. We know that Mark was Peter's spiritual son (1 Pet. 5:13), and it is possible that Mark took sides with Peter in his awkward controversy with Paul over the practice of Jewish traditions. Whatever the case, Paul went one way from Antioch and Barnabas went another. For at least a season, an effective ministry team was fragmented.

When we piece the entire story together, however, we discover that Paul and Mark eventually reconciled. In the letter to Philemon, Mark is mentioned as part of Paul's team (v. 24). In Colossians 4:10, Paul says of Mark: "If he comes to you, welcome him." And in Paul's last epistle, he tells Timothy: "Pick up Mark and bring him with you, for he is useful to me for service" (2 Tim. 4:11).

To say that Mark was "useful" was an understatement. After all, it was Mark who, years after he disappointed Paul with his bad behavior, wrote the gospel that bears his name. Most scholars believe Mark based his account on Peter's firsthand experiences with Jesus.

The story of Paul and Mark is a dramatic picture of forgiveness, redemption and second chances. An ugly conflict was resolved. A bitter dispute was reconciled. And a young man's ministry was restored after he made an embarrassing mistake.

This is the way New Testament Christianity is supposed to work. Jesus constantly taught on the primacy of forgiveness, and the early apostles urged their disciples to keep short accounts.

Paul, especially, asked his followers to soak their lives in love. He told the Colossians: "Put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone...Beyond all these put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity" (Col. 3:12-14).

That is the New Testament's gold standard, but what we practice today falls short. Too often, pastors who parted ways years ago still don't speak to each other. The necessity of forgiveness is rarely preached. Many Christians nurse grudges for years; others collect offenses like packrats. Many people are wounded in one church and then move to another—carrying their resentment and bitterness with them.

What we don't realize is that unresolved conflict can short-circuit the power of God in our lives, and it makes the church weak and irrelevant. Many of us have prayed that the Holy Spirit would unleash a fresh wave of revival in our midst. But perhaps we need to ask these simple questions first:

• Am I carrying any personal resentment in my heart toward anyone?
• 
  Am I still carrying around baggage from previous conflicts?
• 
  Have I judged a person because of their mistakes, and determined in my heart that they can never change? If they are willing to repent, am I willing to release them?
• Has my love for people—especially other Christians—become cold, artificial and hypocritical, rather than warm and affectionate?

If we want New Testament power, we must also pursue New Testament love. We cannot expect to reconcile sinners to God if we have not practiced reconciliation with each other.

J. Lee Grady is contributing editor of Charisma. You can find him on Twitter at leegrady. His latest book is The Holy Spirit Is Not for Sale. (Chosen Books).

"Gifting" by Halcyon

I begin my journey back to Burning Man in about a week. This is my third trip t the playa and I'm thrilled that Nadine finally gets to join me! Gifting is one of Burning Man's cultural distinctives. In the video below halcyon describes it extraordinarily well, enjoy.



"Gifting" - by Halcyon from Belief Buffet on Vimeo.

Why Do Bad Things Happen?

I participated in a lively group discussion last night. A group of friends have been gathering for a few weeks now. We eat together, worship a bit and talk about... stuff. So last night I threw out the following question: “Why do bad things happen?”

Now all those assembled have been around church circles most of their lives. Through the years we’d all been exposed to various theologies and philosophies attempting to explain this age old question. Here are a few of the answers we came up with:

• We are reaping what we’ve sown
• We’re out of God’s will
• There's a lesson we need to learn
• It’s warfare, a spiritual attack
• It’s the effect of our sin
• It’s the effect of someone else’s sin
• It’s demonic payback or backlash for our good deeds
• The injustice experienced creates an opportunity for Divine justice
• A combination of the above explanations

My guess is that you could add a few additional items to this list.

So, here’s my point, when bad things happen – do we really know why? Do we know with a definitive certainty why it happened? I think not. If we’re uncertain why bad things happen to us, then we’re even less certain why they happen to others. That uncertainty is a very good reason for grace. Grace toward others and ourselves; grace and dramatically less judgment. Bad things happen and we don’t always know why. When bad things do happen may our default position be one of grace.

What say you?

.

The Dark Side of Submission

The Dark Side of Submission

Wednesday, 04 November 2009 10:36 AM EST J. Lee GradyNewsletters - Fire In My Bones

Christian teaching on male headship is often used as a weapon against women. This abuse must be confronted.

Last week during a ministry trip to Hungary I heard a painfully familiar story. Through a translator, a tearful young woman living near Budapest explained that her Christian husband was angrily demanding her absolute submission. This included, among other things, that she clean their house according to his strict standards and that she engage in sexual acts with him that made her feel uncomfortable and dirty.

This lady was not demanding her rights or trying to be disrespectful. She was a godly, humble woman who obviously wanted to please the Lord. But she had been beaten to a pulp emotionally, and she was receiving little help from her pastor—who was either unwilling or unprepared to confront wife abuse.

"Traditionalists assume that a Christian marriage is defined as a dominant husband who makes all family decisions while the wife graciously obeys without input. Yet Scripture actually portrays marriage as a loving partnership."

I've heard so many sickening versions of this scenario. In Kenya recently, several women told me their AIDS-infected husbands often raped them—and then their pastors told them they must submit to this treatment. In some parts of India, even some pastors believe it is acceptable to beat their wives if they argue with them or show any form of disrespect. And in some conservative churches in the United States, women are told that obedience to God is measured by their wifely submission—even if their husbands are addicted to alcohol or pornography, or if they are involved in adulterous affairs.

This distortion of biblical teaching has plunged countless Christian women into depression and emotional trauma. I'm not sure which is worse: The harsh words they hear from their husbands, or the perverse way the Bible is wielded as a leather belt to justify domestic abuse. Here are three truths we must uncover in order to solve this problem:

1. Marriage is not a hierarchy. Traditionalists assume that a Christian marriage is defined as a dominant husband who makes all family decisions while the wife graciously obeys without input. Yet Scripture actually portrays marriage as a loving partnership and refers to the wife as a "fellow heir of the grace of life" (1 Peter 3:7, NASB). And the apostle Paul taught that in the realm of sexuality, husbands and wives share equal authority over each other's bodies (see 1 Cor. 7:4). In other words, submission in this most intimate part of a marriage covenant is mutual, and this same mutuality is the key to any happy marriage; it fosters respect, communication and an enduring bond.

2. Headship is not a license to control. Traditionalists also cite Ephesians 5:23 to remind wives that their husbands are their "heads"—and they believe this term requires some type of dictatorial control in marriage. Yet the Greek word used in this passage, kephale, does not have anything to do with heavy-handed authority and it cannot be used to enforce male domination. Neither does it imply male superiority. The word can either mean "source" (as in the source of a river) or "one who leads into battle" (as a protector).

Neither original definition of this word gives room for abuse. Headship, in its essence, is not about "who's the boss." Rather it refers to the Genesis account of Eve being taken from Adam's side. The husband is the "source" of the wife because she originated from him, and she is intimately connected to him in a mystical union that is unlike any other human relationship.

3. Men who abuse their wives are out of fellowship with God. 1 Peter 3:7 is clear: "You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so your prayers will not be hindered." Wife abuse is no trivial sin. Any man who berates his wife, treats her as inferior or engages in abusive behavior (including hitting, kicking, raping, cursing at or threatening punishment) will jeopardize his fellowship with the Lord. He will feel frustrated and convicted until he repents.

(And in the same way, I believe, pastors who silently support abusive husbands by refusing to confront the behavior—or by telling women to submit to the pain—participate in this sin and could find their own prayers hindered.)

Truly Christian marriages, according to the apostle Paul, involve a tender, servant-hearted and unselfish husband who (1) loves his wife "just as Christ also loved the church;" (2) loves her as his own body; and (3) loves her as himself (see Eph. 5:25, 28 33). He stands alongside his wife in faithfulness, and she joyfully respects her husband because he can be trusted. And the two become one.

If we are to uphold this golden standard, we must confront abuse, shelter its victims and provide the tough love and counseling necessary to heal troubled relationships. And we have no business telling women to stay in marriages that actually could put them or their children in danger.

J. Lee Grady is editor of Charisma. You can find him on Twitter at leegrady.

The Bridegroom and The Bride

I Loved this! Such a powerful portrayal of love shared between The Bridegroom and The Bride.

Gatlyn Wedding Highlights from Dean Kaneshiro on Vimeo.

A PASTOR ON THE PLAYA?

Why I Go To Burning Man

by Randy Bohlender

I've noticed a thread on the e-playa recently...one where people are swapping stories about what they tell non-burners about Burning Man. Part of the discussion has centered on trying to explain why we go to the Burn. I've faced this question more than my share of times. To a certain extent, I fit the mold. I'm an adventurer. I love travel. I have an auxiliary hole in my head from which dangles the obligatory gold hoop. At first glance, I meld into the Burning Man crowd quite well. Still, if my college graduating class would have had the foresight to vote, I would have probably been voted "Least Likely to Burn".

It's not my appearance that makes me an unlikely burner, it's my paradigm. Prepare your hearts for a shock, gang. I'm a born-again Christian. Even stranger (or some would say even worse), I'm a pastor...have been for years. I've made it my life, and will continue to do so.

2002 was my second trip to Burning Man. Back in 2000, acting on what we would call prompting from God, a team of five of us brought 5,000 bottles of water to give away. It was our way of making a prophetic declaration of what God wants to do in people's lives; bring water to the dry places. We were wonderfully received - burners are great hosts. It was more than a fluke that Renee Roberts was shooting footage for her documentary Gifting It...we spent a good hour on the playa discussing giving, altruism and art. This year, I returned with a larger camp...five people became twelve, one vehicle became three, and five thousand bottles of water became ten thousand. We spent the week gifting water to fellow burners, as our practical demonstration of the love of God. A few folks differed with our philosophy, but none argued about the practicality of the gift, and all were grateful receivers. We became Burners and lived among friends for the week.

As we talked with passing Burners and word got out that "the Christians" were camped at the corner of 225 & Forecastle, we were frequently approached by pleasant people with an innocent question: "Why are you guys here?" It was never asked in anger...just curiosity. People honestly wondered why we would choose to spend so much effort and resources to give to a group that, at least on the surface, seemed to be proudly at odds with much of what the church has stood for down over the years. Our standard answer was "to show you God loves you in a practical way!" Driving the 2200 miles home, covered in dust, I asked myself the same question, and came to the following greater conclusions.

I go to Burning Man because the playa puts me in my place.

I spend entirely too much time in boxes. I have a ranch style, suburban box, where I keep my family and most of my stuff. I have a small, German-made box with wheels where I keep most of my CD's and spend a lot of time on the phone. I have another box where I keep coworkers. In those boxes, I am someone. I have the power to change the climate. I can manipulate the auditory environment. I crown myself king of my boxes, and when my boxes wear out, I will get new ones. The playa is the ultimate out of the box experience. In our boxes, we are in total control. On the playa, we are at the mercy of God (some would say the universe, but remember...I've got a paradigm).

It's on the playa that I realize my finiteness. Only when I'm on the vast expanse...so flat that I can see a storm coming, feel it engulf me, and watch it pass...that I realize that life happens to me much more than I happen to it. For all of the control that I think I exert, it's all on the micro level....where I live, Mac or PC, whether or not to supersize.

The greater matters - disappointment, elation, health, danger, death and the like - race towards me like a playa storm. I can anticipate and prepare, but cannot stop them. On the playa I find my place, and it's not the place of a player who influences a game, but more like the ball itself. The playa makes me yearn to know the coach. It makes my need for God much more evident. I need Him whenever I get out of my box.

Historically, God has chosen the desert as a backdrop when He wanted to strip the peripherals away. He sent John the Baptist as a man burning in the desert, rejecting the traditional luxuries he would have known as a priest's son in favor of a minimal existence and maximum impact . The ancient seer Isaiah prophesied of "a voice calling out in the desert. " As the crowds are drawn to the playa, the crowds were drawn to the desert of Judea to see a man burn, and those who heard his words and took them to heart found new life represented in the ritual of baptism. The 2002 Burning Man theme of life on water couldn't have been more appropriate for John, who knew that the man who left his sins in the water rose alive like never before.

The Spirit of God drew Jesus into the desert for a time of proving and returned Him to the masses full of power. It was in the desert that He faced his own nemesis and discovered the strength held only by those who know self control and God-reliance. Scripturally speaking, time in the desert was never wasted. God draws me to the desert to remind me of who I am, of how little influence I have apart from His plan, and the power He holds over all of us. The playa puts me in my place.

I go to Burning Man because creativity points to a Creator.

Our camp consisted of two teams - an advance team that piloted the stuff out from Cincinnati, arriving Sunday, and a fly-in team who joined us mid week. While the newbies who arrived first acclimated by mid week, we all enjoyed watching the fly-in team's reaction to things we'd grown accustom to. Thursday evening, the fly-in newbies were still buzzing. They'd endured 24 hours of airplanes, rental vehicles, desert roads, and the amazing first-glance of Burning Man. My friend, Robbie, turned around to see the huge harvest moon rising behind The Man. Keep in mind that he'd spent the day looking at whale-buses and lily pads that weren't really there. After staring at the moon for a moment, Robbie asked "Is that the moon or is that something somebody's doing?" I laughed manically; not because it was silly, but because it was plausible. Only at Burning Man could one consider that it really wasn't the moon...that perhaps someone had fabricated it. After all, isn't everything fabricated by someone? From hand painted, fish shaped bicycles built lovingly in people's basements to large scale installations taking a crew of fifty all week to assembe, everything points toward the inner part of man that says "I can make something special...".

What is it within the heart of a man or woman that leads them to create? Why must we augment our reality with our depictions of it? That thing that has driven us to scratch the outline of a wooly mammoth on the wall of a cave, that has pushed us to build pyramids, paint pictures, and build flamethrowers...it is evidence of an aesthetic drive that prohibits us from leaving well enough alone. The animal kingdom has no such compulsions. Never in history has a yak shown interest in sculpture or a chicken so much has strewn straw in a intentional pattern. Why is mankind so different? What is it that is stamped upon our spirit that causes every culture in the world to spawn painters, poets, and sculptors? Inuit or Slav, Semite or Anglo, one cannot find a culture in the world with no appreciation for artistic expression. Theologians would call it 'the image of God'.

The story of Genesis describes the Spirit of God as brooding over the chaos of a preconceived cosmos, and He acted on it. He said "I can do better," and He did. His artwork incorporated elements of color, shape, texture, sound, force, and life itself. Then, from the elements He created, He created a composite, and blew life into it. It became him, and He was in him. Since that day, he has been driven to create just as He did, and so we create...because on our spirit resides a Creative Force.

I go to Burning Man because gifting looks a lot like God's idea.

Giving was a part of our group's ethos long before Renee Roberts released Gifting It. Our church is known locally as the church that gives away Cokes at intersections, gives free newspapers in city parks, and goes door to door in residential areas to wash cars free of charge. We do it as a demonstration of God's love that will make sense to people...a solo on a pipe organ might be hard to relate to, but a clean car in the driveway is something that people find intensely practical.

Our church was founded in the early eighties by Steve Sjogren. Early on, he felt impressed that rather than build a traditional 'come and see' church, he should build a 'go and do' church. A 'come and see' church is based on programs that bring people into the building. Christmas pageants...puppet shows...concerts...none of these activities are inherently bad, just geared for those who are already on the inside track. A 'go and do' church draws people out of their own four walls and into the community. A 'go and do' church brings value to a community by bringing the best of faith to the faithless who need it the most. Just as God has always been the consummate artist, so has He served as an example of 'go and do'. Jesus was constantly moving among the people, doing things like giving people sight and providing the extra wine for a wedding celebration. His message was not merely "the Kingdom is coming", but "The Kingdom is here." He valued action. Jesus was God, going and doing.

It doesn't surprise me that gifting is taking an increasingly high profile at Burning Man. In a large concentration of seekers - people aware of their own spiritual journey - it only makes sense to me that the image of God that has been stamped on humans from the beginning of time would manifest itself, and that in the act of receiving, some would find more than the gift itself.

Wednesday morning, as the last of the rave goers stumbled back towards their camps on the outskirts of the ring, we stood giving away bottles of water. Behind us loomed our camp, complete with a large sculpture we called "En Gedi". En Gedi depicted a huge boulder with a spring flowing from the top. The name En Gedi refers to an actual place in the mid east - the oasis in the desert where David hid from Saul. The name is also referred to in the prophetic writings of Ezekiel as the headwaters of God. Our En Gedi featured a beautiful angel on top, bowing low before a golden throne.

A young guy wandered into our camp for some water, and found himself resting in the shade, trying to build up his strength for the final walk back to his tent. After hearing the explanation of our artwork, he asked "Who sits on the throne?"

I told him "God sits on the throne."

The guy glanced up and grinned back at me, "I don't see Him!"

I asked "Where'd you get the bottle of water?"

For a moment, time stood still as he stared at God as represented by the free gift in his hand. He took a swig, looked back up to the throne and quietly said "Thanks, God."

I go to Burning Man because the church has spent too many years at the trailing edge of society.

As a child, I went to church in the fifties, which is only interesting when you realize that I wasn't born until 1967. It wasn't that the actual decade was that of the fifties...just that the church never left it. The music, the style, the attitudes all screamed of an age that I did not know anywhere else other than within those four walls. Although I grew up in a devout Christian family, it was often difficult to take what we were living within the walls of that church on Sunday and make them fit into the culture where we lived the rest of the week.

Because of it's unwillingness to embrace the present, let alone the future, the church has shown itself to be irrelevant to my generation. As a result, when people need help, they rarely turn to the church, even though helping people is what the church is all about. It's not that there's an animosity towards the church; just an ambivalence.

While Burners often take an element of pride in being 'out of the norm", I think they do themselves a great disservice when they fail to realize that they are dragging culture their direction. We may or may not see a national trend of green hair or public nudity, but I do believe that our culture is moving towards the mores of Burning Man. It is the Petri dish of postmodernism...and what is growing on the playa will spread like crazy throughout our world. I want a church that will be there, so I go to Burning Man to grow in my knowledge of the future.

I've learned much in the 2 years I've been associated with Burning Man. Some of it may surprise you. For example:

• While I have a deep seated sense of right and wrong, Burners aren't interested in it. My sense of values cannot be forced upon people. All I have to offer is life and experience...and if I can show them life, they may be interested in my values.
• Given a choice of A, B, or C, most Burners will pick D (all of the above). Creative people refuse to be pigeonholed into given answers. They value the journey of discovery as much as the arrival at fact.

In these two characteristics, I find truths that the church must understand in order to be relevant to post-moderns. First, that people cannot be argued into a system of faith, only drawn in by what they see in others. This is why the Bible tells us that people are drawn to God by His kindness. Second, that if Christianity is going to appeal to people of the future, then the church has to make room for people in process.

I go to Burning Man because I want the church of the future to learn lessons that can only be learned when one goes to where the future is headed.

Finally, I go because I have something to offer.

It didn't take me long to acquire the burner's innate disdain towards spectators. Consuming social capital while contributing nothing to the greater good of the whole, they are societal parasites. We received an incredible variety of things on the playa. Our neighbors made us homemade ice cream. A flamenco guitar player named Tao favored us with a song. Three hilarious young men located somewhere above 255 entertained us with a tag team story telling session that remains so vivid an experience that I laugh out loud when they appear on our video tape. It seems everyone had something to offer, and my 'something to offer' is what brings me the Black Rock City. My gift, though taking the form of a bottle of water, is really much more than that. I come to present hope...a bite sized morsel of grace that people can take home to chew on for themselves.

Towards the end of the week, one young man approached me and said "can you confirm a couple of rumors I've been hearing? "

"Sure" I said.

"Word on the playa is that you guys are all from a church."

The way he said 'church' led me to believe he probably didn't believe the rumor. "Yep," I said, "We are."

His eyes grew wide. "And I also heard that you are a pastor."

"Again, confirmed."

He then moved in for the kill. "And I heard you came out here to convert us all."

I looked both ways as if to see if we were being spied on, leaned forward and asked "Do you own your own home?"

He seemed a little stunned. "Yeah. Bought it last year."

"How long did you look for a house?" I continued.

This line of questioning was not what he expected. "I don't know - maybe six months."

I smiled. "Okay, so it took you six months to find a place to live. That's not unusual. Some people look for a year or more and no wonder...it's a huge decision. If it seems normal to look for a house that long, don't you think it would be arrogant for us to anticipate that you would make a major religious paradigm shift out here in the desert in just one or two short conversations?"

"Uh, yea" he said. By this time, he was more puzzled than he had been when he walked in.

"We're not so arrogant as to expect that you're going to change everything about what you believe just because we told you...but we do think that if you walk away from this experience thinking a little differently about God or the people who claim to serve Him, that's a good thing. Drink our water. Hang out. Be our friend. Then go home and make your own decision about the God that motivates us."

I go to Burning Man because I have something to offer...a fresh perspective of an old institution. An image of the church rising from the ashes of hypocrisy to prove itself relevant to the age...an image of a church made of servants, in the model of Jesus, caring for people and loving God.

And that's why I go to the Burn.

Randy Bohlender's blog

After Six Months

It's been a long difficult battle, harder this time than the last but in the end we were victorious. Yes, we because you never fight this fight alone.

After six months of needles, blood tests, chemo treatments, nausea, fatigue, bone pain, digestion issues and insomnia...

After six months of faithful intercessors, loving family members and caring friends...

After six months of enjoying the good days, enduring the bad days, and just choosing to go forward...

After six months of being loved and supported by the most amazing wife any man has ever had...

We got a good report... "no evidence of cancer". I'm back in remission. whew...

To all of you who prayed... thank you!

To all who encouraged, helped and cared... thank you!

To Nadine, I could never have made it through this again without you, you're amazing, you're the best and I'm so glad you're mine. I love you and I thank you. I remain forever yours.

Dear God, thank you.

Ok everybody, break time is over, let’s get back to work!

Jump!

I stand at the edge of another grand life transition.  Six months ago I arrived in Texas with high hopes and great vision.  I leave having made wonderful new friends and with fresh vision for a new calling, a call back home.  

My time in the Dallas Fort Worth Area was short but eventful.  Just a few weeks after my arrival I discovered that I was no longer in remission, Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma had returned.  I would once again face this long and demanding battle.

It seems appropriate that my final chemotherapy treatment was but days prior to my departure.  By the grace of God this dreaded disease will fail to follow me to New York.  I never want to face or fight this giant again.

I'm filled with joy at the thought of returning to pastoral ministry.  Six months behind a desk steeped in administrative duties reminded me how very much I love people and how much I enjoy pastoring them.  I'm excited to return to the land of my birth, the land of real pizza, bagels and cannoli.  The land of my father and my family, the land where I met my wife and where I met the Lord.

I'm eager to bring home all the lessons I learned these past 16 years on the road.  The complete vision has yet to be revealed but this I know, we are to...

• Live Love
  
• Be Light in the Darkness
  
• Export Freedom
  
• Passionately Pursue His Presence
  
• Help People Reach their Destinies
  

That ought to keep us busy for a while.

In a few hours the movers arrive to load the containers, a day later Nadine and I will begin a 15 day road trip back home. Along the way we'll visit many old friends in Alabama, South Carolina, Virginia, West Virginia and Pennsylvania.  Seems like great preparation for making many new friends in Lindenhurst, NY.

My life has been one major Isaiah 55:8-9 life lesson after another... 

"His ways are not my ways, they are higher then my ways."  

The journey hasn't always been easy but God has been in it and it has been one very exciting and dynamic adventure after another.  This next leg of the journey could be the best of them all!

Without hesitation or reservation I'm diving in, I'm going deep, I'm all in... who wants to jump with me?

© Tom Zawacki 2009

The Power of Love

That's the Power of Love from "Back to the Future" seems oddly prophetic but strangely appropriate today.

Enjoy... I sure did.



(Thanks Ty for the inspiration)

31 Years amd Counting

Thirty one years ago today a very cute girl with long dark hair and hazel eyes ask me to take her to her junior prom, I said yes and (with the exception of Jesus) it was the best decision of my life. Three years later after much begging and pleading I made her my wife. Since that day, together we have been through many good times and bad, times of abundance and lack, nights of sickness and days of health... but we have done it all together.

Honey, I was too sick the past few days to get you a card for our special day so I thought I would just post a few thoughts of my own.

Nadine my love, thank you for..

Thirty one amazing years
Two incredible children
Following me across the country and back
Always saying yes to God
Sometimes saying no to me
Sitting with me through all those hours of chemo
Enjoying the good days with me
Enduring the hard ones
And for always going forward
Thank you for bending but never breaking
For being so quick to forgive
And so ready to love
Thank you for being my lover
My best friend
The keeper of my secrets
My guardian of my heart
My protector of my hopes and dreams
Thank you for believing in me when I can't
For pushing me when I won't
And for jumping with me when I jump
I love you today
I have always loved you
I will love you with my last breath
And after that, I will always remain... forever yours

Happy 31st Dating Anniversary Sweetheart,
You really are an amazing woman and I'm so very glad you're mine!
Baby, you're the best!
Tom