Letter from an Agnostic

Letter from an Agnostic
By James Archer

Dealing with some sadness tonight regarding people and how they choose to treat me and mine in specific, but others in general. Would like to share a thought about beliefs, religion and dealing with people. If you'd rather not know my feelings about these things, please skip this post.

I grew up in a religious household, and have chosen to disassociate myself from religion as an adult. I am an agnostic, probably- I rarely feel the need to classify myself. From the Greek Gnosis, a basic noun referring to knowledge; the a- prefix makes it a negative: so lack of knowledge is the intended meaning- I admit that I don't know. I don't admit to or confess anything else, just to be perfectly clear.

The problem I find is that some people take it upon themselves to act inappropriately towards me and those I love because they have a religious feeling that is different from my own. And again, to be clear- I am very tolerant of others' religious beliefs- I have no desire to insult anyone's honest findings for themselves, and indeed can admire folks who have found themselves an answer honestly that they can truly believe. This post is not about religion- this post is about people.

When someone says to me and mine any of the following: You are going to hell; You are damned; You must do what I do; You must think what I think; (this one was new to me tonight) When I get to heaven, I won't even have known that you existed, because all of my sorrows will be removed and you will be in hell; or any other such statement...

...the only thing I feel is hurt. I do not feel inspired to believe anything. I do not feel motivated to avoid eternal damnation; I do not feel that the speaker has provided me a service, or shared their beautiful faith- I feel hurt that someone would take it upon themselves to insult my intelligence; to insult my sensibilities; to attempt to instill in me an eternal fear regarding my children; to bear their teeth necessarily and act in a way that insists upon a better than thou attitude; more blessed than thou; more deserving than thou; more insightful than thou; and - oddly - more lucky than thou.
If a person actually cared about me and mine, they would insist on loving us past the point that we could deny their altruism; past the point that we could doubt that they had some type of insight into this painful, stupid, silly and difficult human condition- to the point that we asked them to be let in on their secret-- that we asked to be instructed, if such a time ever came; and if that time never came, they would treat us that way anyway--- because their point would be loving us, and treating in a way they thought was right; not proving to us that we are wrong and they are right, which is the only point when someone informs us that we are damned.

Let me say that again, so it sinks in: If you are trying to win an argument of who has got it all figured out, you are actively turning me and mine away from everything you are saying.

The Jesus that I learned of as a child ate with the sinners; all you know how to do is throw stones.
And so-- if it is your prerogative to ever- ever, ever, ever- I mean one single time, ever-- tell me and my loved ones that we are headed to hell and should change to become more like you, do us both the favor and never-- and I mean never-- speak to any of us again. I have shielded my own feeling and thoughts many times in my life, in order to keep from upsetting people in this very important and very sensitive area, but I am officially done with that now. Now, when you behave offensively, I will speak my mind.

A last thought-

When I think of my father, I think of a great example of someone with strong religious beliefs who behaves correctly to the people he encounters-- my father would love to tell you his thoughts, but he is willing to love you even if you disagree with him, and he will feed you without feeling like you owe it to him to convert. A brilliant example of a person who professes love, and then attempts to live it. If all religious people did more of that, and less of the other, I imagine there'd be a few more folks at your church--- and more importantly than that, you’d be treating people in a respectable manner-- a manner that they deserve from you, no matter your opinion of their religious associations or lack thereof.

(a quick note to my atheist and agnostic or other friends-- please do not use this post as an open forum to bash the religious-- I have no desire to be involved in that; this is a thought about people, not about God)

Stained Glass Masquerade

"Stained Glass Masquerade"

Is there anyone that fails
Is there anyone that falls
Am I the only one in church today feelin' so small

Cause when I take a look around
Everybody seems so strong
I know they'll soon discover
That I don't belong

So I tuck it all away, like everything's okay
If I make them all believe it, maybe I'll believe it too
So with a painted grin, I play the part again
So everyone will see me the way that I see them

Are we happy plastic people
Under shiny plastic steeples
With walls around our weakness
And smiles to hide our pain
But if the invitation's open
To every heart that has been broken
Maybe then we close the curtain
On our stained glass masquerade

Is there anyone who's been there
Are there any hands to raise
Am I the only one who's traded
In the altar for a stage

The performance is convincing
And we know every line by heart
Only when no one is watching
Can we really fall apart

But would it set me free
If I dared to let you see
The truth behind the person
That you imagine me to be

Would your arms be open
Or would you walk away
Would the love of Jesus
Be enough to make you stay 

The Man I Want To Be

No More Infomercial Christianity

To all my colleagues in "the ministry" when we utilize hype, exaggeration or manipulation to communicate our message, promote our ministries or ask for financial support; we do more harm than good to God's Kingdom. The collateral damage is spiritually devastating to the churched, the unchurched and the post churched. It's wrong, it's deceptive, it's sin and it's time to stop it!

When we hype the supernatural we're actually desensitize people to the real presence and power of God. Using hype to promote ourselves or advance ministry is selfish and deeply damaging the work of Christ around the world. It would be better to do nothing than to employ these deceptive models. Enough is enough. No more infomercial Christianity. It's time to walk the walk.

Choose Life

Passion & Conviction!

In my previous post I issued the challenge “What Will You Fight For!” coupling it with one of my all time favorite movie scenes from Mel Gibson’s Braveheart. Answering my own question “What Will I Fight For” left me with a pile of refuge I realized I am NOT willing to fight for.

One of the cable networks has been playing Gladiator repeatedly the past few days. I love that movie. It stirs passion within me at a very deep level.

Most movie quote websites prominently posted the revenge scene dialogue where the now Gladiator Maximus finally has his opportunity to stand face to face with Emperor Commodus the former friend who murdered his way to the throne including Maximus’ wife and young son. Removing his mask Maximus reveals his true identity to a stunned Emperor Commodus and says:

“My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, Commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true Emperor, Marcus Aurelius, Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. I will have my vengeance, in this life... or the next."

Powerful scene, but not my personal favorite, the picture at the top of this post is from an obscure scene earlier in the movie. Here the yet to be murdered Emperor Marcus Aurelius (played by Richard Harris) offers the Roman Empire to Maximus – and I love his reply.

Marcus Aurelius: You have proven your valor once again, Maximus. Let us hope for the last time.

Maximus: There is no one left to fight, sire.

Marcus Aurelius: There is always someone left to fight. How can I reward Rome's greatest general?

Maximus: Let me go home.

Marcus Aurelius: Ah, home.

Marcus Aurelius: Won't you accept this great honor that I have offered you?

Maximus: With all my heart, no.

Marcus Aurelius: Maximus that is why it must be you.

Like Maximus, I will NOT fight for fame, for fortune, for title, for position, for glory, for a worldly measure of success, to build my own kingdom, or any man’s kingdom. Oh God make me a man after your own heart. May your passion surge through my soul! May I have the passions and convictions of Wallace and Maximus until my final breathe – so be it.

© Tom Zawacki 2008

Handling Disunity

By Rick Warren

There’s an unseen factor in Saddleback Church’s growth that most people overlook – church unity. God blesses a unified church. Many churches have tremendous potential, but they never achieve what God desires because the members spend all their time fighting with one another. All of the energy is focused inward.

The Bible talks more about unity of the church than it does about either heaven or hell. It’s that important. Churches are made up of people, and there are no perfect people. So people get into conflict with each other. As pastors, we need to learn how to deal with those situations. Specifically, we’re called to do these six things when disunity threatens our church.

1. Avoid situations that cause arguments. The Bible says in 2 Timothy 2:23-24 (NIV): "Don't have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful." Pastors should avoid causing arguments. As a leader you need to set the example for your whole church on this issue. When a minor argument comes along, refuse to get in the middle of it. You don’t need to have an opinion on everything. Some discussions don’t deserve your participation. Focus your conversation on topics that matter.

2. Teach troublemakers to repent. 2 Timothy 2:25-26 (NIV) says, "Those who oppose him [the pastor] he must gently instruct, in the hope that God will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, and that they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will." Most pastors don’t like confrontations. But we can’t run from them. As the pastor, you must gently instruct those creating dissention and opposing the teaching in the church.

3. Warn those causing trouble that their negative words hurt others. 2 Timothy 2:14 (NIV) says, "Keep reminding them of these things. Warn them before God against quarreling about words. It is of no value and only ruins those who listen." People need to know that their words have consequences.

4. Make a plea for harmony and unity. Paul did this in Philippians 4:2 (NIV). He said, "I plead with Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in the Lord." There were two very strong willed women in the church named Euodias and Syntyche who were causing so much friction in the church that Paul’s plea for them to stay united is in the Bible. Fighting in a church doesn’t just affect the combatants; it influences the whole church as people start taking sides. Just like Paul did, at times, you’ll need to make a plea for unity directly to those causing problems.

5. Rebuke with authority if necessary. Paul says in Titus 2:15-3:1, "These, then, are the things you should teach. Encourage and rebuke with all authority. Do not let anyone despise you. Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good." You may need to confront the contentious person as well.

6. Remove them from the church if they ignore two warnings. Titus 3:10-11 says, "Warn a divisive person once, and then warn him a second time. After that, have nothing to do with him. You may be sure that such a man is warped and sinful; he is self-condemned." No pastor wants to do this, but at last resort you may need to remove the contentious person from the church. You’ve got to protect the unity of your church. If that means getting rid of troublemakers, do it.

The Bible teaches that as the church grows, Satan will do everything he can to cause division. Even well meaning people, even believers, can be used as tools of Satan to hurt the body of Christ. As pastors, as shepherds of God’s people, it’s our job to protect our congregations from Satan’s greatest weapon – disunity. It’s not always easy, but it’s what we’ve been called to do.

Rick Warren is the founding pastor of Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, Calif., one of America's largest and best-known churches. In addition, Rick is author of the New York Times bestseller The Purpose-Driven Life and The Purpose-Driven Church, which was named one of the 100 Christian books that changed the 20th Century. He is also founder of Pastors.com, a global Internet community for ministers. Copyright 2005 Pastors.com, Inc. Used with permission. All rights reserved.

Picture Credit: “Arrow as exchange of ideas between faces" by Mike Quon

Tested by God, Judged by Men

Applicable to most stations of life but particularly true of pastors, we’re tested by God while being judged by men. People pleasing, it’s a paralyzing disease and an unwinnable contest.

When you’ve been a churchman as long as I have, you know enough scripture to support any position, action or inaction. As do those sojourners who’ve been on the journey as long as you have. If you take a stand for truth, a passionate congregant may counter your position with a demand for love. A firm position on righteousness brings a cry for mercy. While a call for grace raises a serious concern for holiness. And of course every position is backed by the requisite chapter and verse.

Long ago I discovered that saying yes to God may mean saying no to man. A more recent revelation has been the realization that to pass God’s test I’ll need to endure man’s judgment. Even with a superhuman combined feat of theological, relational and oratory gymnastics I may at best satisfy groups “A” and “B”. Group “C” is destined to despise me. And if I were to somehow unveil the mystery to making everyone happy, I will have no doubt in the processes failed God’s test.

Hmmm, what’s man to do?

The people pleaser keeps the plates spinning until he develops an ulcer. He saddles his wife and staff with unrealistic expectations, he runs his church ragged and soon after quits a broken and bitter man. The fear of man is a harsh and merciless taskmaster!

The God pleaser, on the other hand presses into God. He captures God’s heart for the moment and blinded by faith leaps into action. Jesus followed this path, and as a result the crowds turned on him, his closest friends abandoned him, the faithful crucified him and he saved mankind. Men judged Jesus and men will judge us too, expect it, it’s inevitable. (John 15:18-25)

This whole being a “living sacrifice” thing seems more and more real. Yes, I’ll follow the Man from Galilee. I’ll pass the tests he lays before me, I’ll endure the consequences and hopefully I’ll choose to love each step of the way. How about you?

‘Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship..” Romans 12:1

© Tom Zawacki 2007

Freedom & Responsibility Continued

I have a passion for freedom. As a pastor I have encouraged my people to pursue the fullness of freedom, the freedom Christ won for them on the cross. We have explored this freedom in how we do church. We’ve passionately expressed freedom in the look of our facility, the style of our worship, the way we dance and the artwork hanging on our walls. Another expression of this freedom is our pursuit of spiritual gifts. We eagerly desire spiritual gifts, especially the gift of prophesy to paraphrase 1 Corinthians 14:1. I want to live a supernatural life and that personal passion has worked its way into the spiritual DNA of our church.

This passion for freedom has taken us out side the proverbial church box. I like it that way and so do most of the folks who are part of The Bridge. However, have you ever noticed that when something is different, it sticks out? In some ways we at The Bridge stick out. Christians and non-Christians alike have noticed that there’s something different about us - not better, just different. There’s a responsibility that comes with that difference. Our freedom has come with a built in responsibility.

If we want to be different and allow others to witness that difference, we have a responsibility to live our lives in holiness and humility. We have a responsibility to be men and women of character and integrity.

If we’re unusual, unique, different or outside the box without character, people will simply think we're weird and disregard us. On the other hand, if we choose to buck the status quo but live lives categorized by love, peace & joy… people will not only notice, they’ll want some of it for themselves.

Lord, help me. Help us. May we be a people, your people – living out the fullness of freedom with character, holiness, humility and love, amen.

© Tom Zawacki 2006

Freedom & Responsibility

While writing yesterday’s blog entry I came across an article written by Elizabeth Lane Lawley. Her blog titled Mamamusings had an insightful article titled “The Freedom / Responsibility Curve”. On August 3rd 2006 she wrote…

The Freedom/Responsibility Curve
Lane and I are in my office this evening, and we just heard a staff member and a student having a discussion in the hallway. The staff member was (I think) talking about his small child, and he was bemoaning the fact the child seems not to appreciate how good his or her life is.

In an aggravated tone, the staff member said "I mean, you get the first five years of your life free, and maybe the last five years, and the rest of the time in between you're working your ass off at school or at work. Why can't kids appreciate how good they've got it during those first five years?"

Lane looked at me and said "It's true, isn't it?"

And I said "Not if you pick the right job."

We talked about it a bit, and I ended up drawing this curve on my whiteboard:


Little kids, I told him, have few responsibilities, it's true. No school, no work. But they have very little freedom to match that. Other people tell them what to do, and how and when to do it.

As you get older, your responsibilities increase, but along with it so does your freedom.

If your responsibilities get too overwhelming, your freedom starts to decrease again, to where you have no time to do anything than what's required of you by others.

So, somewhere in the middle is the sweet spot...where you've got enough responsibility to be able to earn your freedom, but not so much that you're trapped by it.

I don’t know anything about Ms. Lawley but she seems to be onto something here. There is a direct connection between Freedom & Responsibility. Just this past week I had the opportunity to learn (yet again) that although I may have the freedom to act a certain way, I’m still responsible for my actions. Freedom to act is not freedom from responsibility. Saint Paul put it this way in his first letter to the church at Corinth:

“Everything is permissible"—but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible"—but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others.” 1 Corinthians 10:23-24

Lord, I ask to be both free & responsible. I pray that in my freedom I might do those things that are permissible, beneficial and constructive… amen.

© Tom Zawacki 2006

Uncle Ben Was Right

Like most Christians I was saddened to hear about Ted Haggard’s moral failure. As of this evening’s news reports he has admitted to purchasing methamphetamines and receiving massages from the male prostitute who has made the accusations against him. Though the timing of the accusations have a clear political motive, it seems that at least some of them are unfortunately true.

Mr. Haggard’s failure is the latest in a long line of ministers who have had very public falls from grace. These men represent almost every theological perspective and cross many denominational lines. This tells me that none of us are immune.

Promotion is a scary wonderful thing. Most of us work long and hard all our lives to be promoted. We celebrate when we finally reach our goal, that’s the wonderful part. The scary part is that the higher we go, the less grace we have. I’m reminded of Uncle Ben’s words to his nephew Peter Parker in Spiderman 1

“With great power comes great responsibility”

Promotion usually means an increase of influence. What we need to remember is that influence is a doubled edged sword; it can cut for good or for harm.

Lord give me grace, give Ted grace, make us holy, keep us humble… amen.

© Tom Zawacki 2006

Weeding My Garden

My adult son lives about three and a half hours away from us. I picked him up earlier today and took him back with me. He’s having a tonsillectomy in a couple of days and will be recuperating at home. The hours alone in the car were profitable. The popular words of Psalm 46:10 came to mind “Be still and know that I am God”.

Over the past year I have discovered again and again the value of being still before God. He delights to reveal himself to me in those quiet times. Sometimes the busyness of life gets the best of me and I allow myself to be robbed of this precious gift. The past few days have been very busy. It was nice to have the alone time in the car.

The miles brought clarity then conviction and finally peace. The Lord reminded me that I will reap what I sow. It’s a truth, a natural and spiritual law that is inescapable. If I sow carrot seeds - guess what, I get carrots. If I sow tomato seeds I’ll get tomatoes. I can’t expect to reap cherries if I sow radishes.

For me the application was clear… the way I treat others is the way I will be treated. If I sow anger, I will reap anger. If I sow mercy, I will reap mercy. If I sow pride, I will reap pride. If I sow humility, I will reap humility. If I sow grace, I will reap grace and if I sow love, I will reap love.

Father, Jesus said you are The Gardener. Gardener come, tend my garden. Plow my soil. Remove my weeds. Remove my thorns. Remove my stones. Change my crops to your crops until your fruit is borne in me, amen.

© Tom Zawacki 2006